Friday, March 13, 2015

Different Kinds Of Haters

People like happy endings...

...apparently in movies, and books...

...but not necessarily in real life.

I guess we'd first need to come to an agreement about the true value of "happiness," vs. "joy."
The Bible teaches us to be joyful in situations when we face trials of many kinds. There is something greater and deeper in the realm of joy, than what is contained in mere pursuit of happiness. 

Happiness is fleeting, but joy can be everlasting.

Happiness depends on the subjective reaction to any and every situation.

Joy depends on the objective Truth and Hope, only to be found in Christ Jesus.

That leads me to the purpose of the title, "Different Kinds Of Haters."

In fiction, people want to hear the "happy ending," or the fairytale cliché, "...and they lived happily ever after." All you see or hear at the end of a story is a momentary slice of temporal satisfaction. You don't hear the real-life story of two sinful people living life together, trying to make things work.

Just to clarify, all people are sinful.

With two self-centered, sinful human beings, there will be conflict.

If you add the element of infidelity into the mix, you've just made matters 1,000,000 times worse.

However, the relationship doesn't have to end. (Please read my prior posts to understand where I'm coming from). With true repentance, forgiveness, and grace, a marriage can be restored.

Here is where we discover different kinds of haters.

In fiction, people want the standard happy ending. In reality - in situations involving infidelity - people want a different kind of "happy" ending. According to secular opinion, (and even in many Christian circles) the person in the relationship who has been wronged is justified in "dumping," or divorcing the cheating spouse.

When those people hear of situations like ours, they don't respond kindly. They take a combative and negative approach, "You're stupid for sticking around." "Once a cheater, always a cheater." "I'd throw his ____ out."

I'm not in support of any kind of infidelity (in the thought life, in your heart, or physically). However, I know it happens more often than we realize.

I also know firsthand that a person can repent. I know that a heart can become aligned with the will of Christ Jesus. I know that a restored marriage reflects the very Spirit of God.

We as a human race have turned from God. He loved us before we even knew Him. Even after we enter into a relationship with Him, we still have tendencies to "cheat" on Him (meaning that we sin against Him).

There is an eternal joy available to everyone who believes in Him. There is also a lasting joy that can be experienced when a broken relationship is mended.

Why not celebrate a relationship restored, rather than attack someone who has the courage and grace to forgive?


  1. I have no idea how you found me and sent me a friend request through Google+ and I will admit, the name of your blog kind of made me pause for a minute. I see that your blog is fairly new, so I am guessing that your journey is relatively new as well? The reason I decided to post a comment here is because this is perhaps one of the MOST important topics that needs to be addressed by the Christian church in the 21st century.

    I have a story to tell, as well, but mine did not turn out the way yours appears to be turning out. That story is for another day. For now, I would like to communicate with you and your wife and share your story with the readers of our online Christian women's magazine, Ruby for Women.

    Very few people (including me) have the courage to tell their story, but we both know that this happens to many, many Christian marriages - and the secrecy in and of itself is a contributor to the final death of a marriage.

    So, having said that little bit about my ministry, my message, and my motive, please let me know if you have any interest in communicating about sharing your story and your journey with a wider audience through our women's magazine. So grateful that I found you and truly grateful that your journey appears to be leading you to restoration and forgiveness.

    Sincerely, Nina Newton @ Ruby for Women

    1. Nina,
      I'd like to speak with you regarding your request. Please email me here:
      Thank you